All's Quiet...

It's so perfectly quiet here right now. I'm learning how important that is for me. I need those quiet times to regroup, re-energize and figure out what just happened:)
Yesterday was one of my LONG days. Up at 5:15am to catch the 6:20 ferry. Barb and I spoke on two panels at this fantastic networking conference, SHOP Symposium from about 9:30 - 11:30ish. WOW! We were surrounded by beautiful, intelligent and inspiring women both on and off stage. Love doing this - it really affirms what it is we do and the impact we can have if we get out there. Having women come up to you and say, "Thank you so much - that really helped me". How could I ever have known that my path would lead here?
A funnier comment was, "did you ever think you would be a celebrity?" I started laughing since obviously, she must be joking, right? But when I looked at her, she was waiting for my honest response. What do you say to that? "Ummm, no?"
After lunch we stayed and watched some other panels discuss the whole new world of Social Media and the impact it can have on your biz. A bit overwhelming but kinda exciting too. Twitter...here I come!
Great connects for future business, great inspiration from powerful women and great to get the hell outta there at the end of the day! My overstimulation sensor is quite low these days so at a certain point, with so many people around and no escape in sight - I need to bolt. Arriving home last night to our little haven was the best cure. Now, time to process, remember and allow...
And, it's a sunny day!

Bad Blogger!

Not great at keeping up to date these days. Still haven't found my cord to transfer all my great pix onto my computer so that takes some of the fun out of it for me. Busy busy time tho'. Lots going on - including bringing our boat over to the coast yesterday. The plan was to take it all the way to Port Staleshen (towards Sechelt) but after 4 1/2 hours of motoring against the wind and some big rolling waves, we pulled into the Gibsons Marina - if only they'd let us stay:) It wasn't a bad day - lots of beautiful scenery along the way, but not quite as mild as we'd been assured by the marine forecast. We're going to try again in the morning to get her to her destination. I'll post a couple pix from G's blackberry (a bit grainy but better than nothing?) Also, we bought these chairs for our fireplace room last weekend which I think are quite lovely and different. I LOVE different! Hope you're all well...

Right here, Right now...

I had a day a couple of weeks ago that felt perfectly right. It was a Monday and I stayed in my pajamas most of the day - working on the computer. I didn't have any of those niggly feelings that I usually have, telling me that I should be somewhere else, I should be doing something else. Having that day really showed me how rare that feeling is for me. How seldom I can just BE in the moment without worrying, wondering, stressing, fretting, apologising. I want that feeling more. I believe part of that is just letting go of expectation - mine and others', and really trusting my own senses, needs, wants. It was just about a year ago that I took off for one night to a B&B in Gibsons. I struggled throughout those days to know what it was I wanted to do, feel, experience. Don't get me wrong, I had a great time and enjoyed the not knowing, connecting to myself in that way. It was also during that trip that I dreamed the dream of living here. I remember walking along the beach (which is now the beach that is at the bottom of our hill), wondering what it would be like to have access to that place on a regular basis. How would it feel to live in Gibsons?
Well...I'll tell you, it's pretty great! There has not been one moment of regret or doubt. Every part of my being says, this is where you are meant to be, right now. I believe G feels the same way too. One more example of opening up to the universe and asking.


Life is good!

Happy Spring!?!

It's spring fever. That is what the name of it is. And when you've got it, you want - oh, you don't quite know what it is you do want, but it just fairly makes your heart ache, you want it so! ~Mark Twain

Good morning everyone and happy SPRING to you! I can hear the birds chirping away outside and I've got a pot full of pink hyacinths beside my bed so it smells like spring. I'm just going to put on my rose-coloured glasses today and believe that the wonderful weather is on it's way. My tulips and crocus' (or is it croci?) are very optimistically peaking their heads up through the earth.

I wish you all a wonder-filled weekend!

Giving Back...

This is a letter I received the other day regarding my KIVA loan. It helped put things into perspective...

Dear Lorna Ketler,
This is an update on your loan to Sreypov Chim in Cambodia.
On the Koh Dach Island on the Mekong River, I visited Sreypov on a Tuesday morning. With me was Sothea, a friendly credit officer working for MAXIMA, one of Kiva’s four partner microfinance organizations in Cambodia. As a Kiva Fellow at MAXIMA, I travel with loan officers and company employees to meet borrowers and see the impact of microfinance firsthand.

When Sothea and I pulled up to Sreypov’s house, Sreypov was seated by her loom while her son, Mia (age 5), played nearby. In this video, you can see Sreypov weaving two-toned purple fabric while Mia watches. I say“Suis-stye!” to Mia, which means “Hello!” Link to video:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whLIEyBTwos

This is Sreypov’s third loan with MAXIMA, but her first loan on Kiva. She borrowed $300 to buy silk thread, which she purchases in Phnom Penh.She pays $53 for 1 unit of silk. She weaves from 7 am until 10 or 11 am,when she makes lunch for her family. She starts weaving again around 1or 2pm, finishing in the evening around 5pm.

It takes Sreypov 2-3 days to make one kabun. (1 sheet of silk, about 3.8meters long). If she’s busy, it could take her 4 days to complete a kabun. Four months ago, she could sell each kabun to a middleman for$10. Now, prices have dropped and she sells her silk for $8. She guessed that the economic problems were causing her prices to fall, because people aren’t buying silk as often. She hopes that conditions will improve, as it affects her ability to support her family.

With the money she makes from her silk, Sreypov purchases food for her family and pays for the school fee to send her son to school. She also uses some money to pay her loan back. Although she pays her loans back on time, she is dependent on the market for her products to sell at a good price.
Before leaving to visit more weavers on the island, I thanked Sreypov for her time and wished her success: “Some nang lo’ah!” – Goodluck!

I Didn't Do Anything Wrong...

I've been accused of cheating. Or at least that's what it feels like. My intentions are pure and pretty clear but the other person seems to be acting from fear and past experience. I get that.

What I don't understand is my regression to that shamed feeling of me as a 7 year old girl who's just been accused of copying the answers by my teacher and no amount of explanation will convince her otherwise. (I wasn't copying!)

My heart is thumping, my face feels flushed. I didn't do anything wrong so why does it feel like I have to apologize and 'over-the-top' make up for their insecurity? How do 'normal' people react to being confronted unfairly? Me, my head feels like it's going to explode and I have no resource of confidence or words until much, much later and the opportunity is lost.

I was having a pretty good day...thanks for listening:)

It's All Good...

One day soon, I'll have my camera, charger, adapter cord and computer all in one place at the same time. I finally got my computer back (she was very much missed!) and now I can't find my camera adapter cord to transfer my pix on so...I'm writing anyway (pictures to come soooon).

I feel very settled today - in my jammies watching the snow fall and working away on some new Bodacious stuff. We had lots of company over the weekend which was pretty great - my dad, step-mom, grandma, brother and his whole family and my uncle and cousin were all here at some point over the past few days. Lots of great visiting and catching up.
One of my favourite things is hearing my dad and grandma tell stories from the "old days" when my dad was a small boy in Mexico. One I hadn't heard before connected Pancho Villa to their hometown of Chihuahua (well before my dad was born but still connected to our family)!

My grandma moved to Mexico when she was 4 years old with some of the first Mennonite settlers over there. The land was cheap and uncultivated and they were able to practice their religion without the threat of being conscripted. Their culture wasn't necessarily welcomed by all of the local Mexicans and the families had to find a way to communicate and do business in this new land.
Apparently, my grandma's uncle found a stash of gold (we're talking several gold bars) on their land and decided to make a dash for the border - thinking it would be easier to keep it if he was outside of Mexico. Unfortunately, that's as far as his plan went, and all of the gold was confiscated by the border patrol. This was the year before Pancho Villa was killed and there were rumours that his gold was hidden in the vicinity. That's as far as the story goes for now but I'm looking into it:) Imagine how history might have been different had his plan worked!
Hope you all had a great weekend - now it's hailing!!!

Feeling Groovy...

I've had a hard time smiling lately. I hadn't even noticed it but now that my mood has shifted back to normal, I realize that I just went through a bit of a low spell. To look back at it now, it feels like it was some kind of protective sheild I put around myself in order not to be hurt but I have no idea why. Yesterday and today I feel like I have some new energy - smiling easier, laughing and even wanting to dance around the house. Funny when you're in a funk, sometimes you don't even know it. I know that I have no reason to complain and I'm not. Maybe just the crazy changes through the worst winter in 40 years somehow caught up with me - but anyway...I'm back and it feels so much better! There are crocuses coming up in my garden, the buds are sprouting on my brand new lilac tree and my family is coming to visit this weekend. It's all good! I'll post some pix once I get my own computer back (hopefully tomorrow). There was an amazing sunset coming home on the ferry last night!
Happy hump day to you!

Miss Me?

Sorry I've been out of touch - once again, I'm computer-less (my on/off switch needed fixing and apparently that takes at least a week!) so have to steal G's when I can. Things are going great - working out again (finally - that was a pretty long break:), finishing some projects around the house (got our new blinds installed on Friday! Love them!) and working on a new project that I'll update you on in the next coupla weeks. This weekend, my dad, step-mom and grandma will be coming for a visit. Can't wait!
See ya sooooon...